Last year I arrived at Oslo airport late one evening. My luggage did not. A lot of fellow passengers had the same problem. It was late. We were tired. The last train loomed before long hours of no transport from midnight to 5AM. Other than a taxi, of course, but that would cost more than the flight from Johannesburg.
I was still in “SA mode”. No matter how I tried to catch the eye of the lady explaining the problem she avoided me as she spoke to the crowd in Norwegian. When she stopped I had a head of steam brewing. Whatever I said so upset her that she told me that she would not speak to me and then left.
When I went to the counter to speak to her superior, she gently told me much the same. And, no, she would not fire her colleague. I felt that I had handled the request in a somewhat restrained manner.
In Norway, as it is in much of northern Europe, it is not polite to lose your temper or even to show vexation.
It matters not that you are late. You should have left earlier.
It matters not that you feel you have wasted your money. You should have worked out the costs before buying the service.
The more you start to steam the less respect or response you will get. If you persist they will just turn their back on you.
They do not care that this is not the way we do it in SA. They prefer their way and you are a visitor, even if you have lived here for two generations.
I raise this point as I am guiding a bunch of fine people into online adventures that use foreign services for payment processing, webinar services for broadcasting, accounting services…
When something does not quite meet our needs our standard SA approach is to make a list of each tiny facet that we feel has gone wrong. Then we detail each before we demand rapid resolution. We want the darn thing to work at the price we want to pay as well as an apology for having our time wasted on top of a guarantee that no such thing will ever happen again. As we get into the debate our voice rises, even it is on email.
My point: The web brings us all close together enough for this to matter a lot.
When dealing with anyone outside SA simply ask for help. Detail the problem as you see it. Not the fallout in your life. Not how you feel about it. Not what it has cost you so far.
The person you are talking to usually has no control over any of that. The person you are talking is not the reason you are angry. But he (or she) is the first step towards solving your problem. Make it easy for that person to help you by keeping your overload to yourself. Fix the problem first, then feel free to let your hidden “SA” out.
And then, if you feel so strongly about the issue, use another supplier next time.
This approach might also work when dealing with SA suppliers.